The following article was written by a good friend and professional colleague of mine, Steve Parrett. Steve is a retired vocational rehabilitation counselor, who worked with alcohol and drug addicted clients for over thirty years. He was considered one of the best counselors among his peers, and his words put a slant on addiction that the public does not hear about in the general media. My hope is that anyone reading his article, who is struggling with addiction themselves, or is associated with a friend or loved one with this disorder, can put in proper perspective what needs to be done to  arrest this disease and begin to lead a normal life. It will also give assistance to professional caretakers who work with addicted clients.

 

VOCATIONAL REHABILITATION AND THE DISEASE OF ADDICTION

A Severe and Permanent Disability

By

Steve Parrett, M.Ed, M.Div.

 

The disease of addiction, including chemical dependency and other addictive disorders, definitely belongs in the category of permanent disabilities. Even when addiction is in a state of remission, it presents barriers to social and vocational functioning, because it is a chronic, progressive, potentially fatal disease, which can never be cured, although it can be controlled in the context of a lifelong recovery program that must be worked every day.

During the course of human development, the addictive individual has either never learned, or has lost touch, with the normal, appropriate ways to feel good about oneself: acceptance by and interaction with others (social), and a sense of personal achievement or accomplishment (primarily vocational for adults in our society). This brings about low self-esteem and creates a painful emptiness within the person. In order to fill this void and to feel better, the potential addict finds a vehicle that will instantly produce a change of mood that is pleasurable, intense, stimulating, exciting. Behaviors used to achieve these results are most often the use of alcohol and/other drugs, but could involve compulsive acting out of one or more pleasurable behaviors, such as eating, gambling, sex, spending money, or winning the approval of others. As the behavior is repeated, it becomes habitual and creates the illusion of control and direction in an otherwise fragmented life. Although the pleasure derived from the behavior decreases over time, the behavior is perpetuated to avoid pain (withdrawal) and to try desperately to recapture the familiar “ high.” At this point, the abuser has become an addict and has formed an intense emotional “relationship” with a chemical (mood-altering substance) or event (acting-out behavior).

As the abuse progresses to dependence and addiction, there occurs regression and deterioration in adult responsibility and functioning in all areas of life. As more and more time and energy is expended on and around the addictive behavior, the addict becomes increasingly isolated from other people and less capable of fulfilling responsibilities. There are definite functional limitations to employment. Using chemicals or acting out on the job causes impaired judgment and decreased work tolerance, resulting in sub-standard quality and/or quantity of work accomplished. An addict’s ability to concentrate and fulfill work duties can also be impaired by an obsessive/compulsive craving to feed the addiction and/or making plans to do so. Practicing the addiction off the job can cause excessive absenteeism from work due to several factors: related physical problems (including withdrawal), legal difficulties, impaired sense of timing and prioritizing, and a general loss of motivation to get to work due to an excessive pre-occupation with the addiction.

Addictive behavior becomes a habitual way of life and is continually repeated in spite of self-defeating and even self-destructive consequences. Addictive thinking replaces the logic of common sense as it becomes embedded in one’s personality structure. This delusional way of thinking includes persistent denial that this destructive process is taking place. Problems and consequences are explained away by blaming others and by a variety of creative excuses. On a deeper level, however, there is self-blame, guilt, and shame—painful feelings that can be relieved temporarily by more addictive behavior, which in turn causes more harmful consequences and pain, and so on in a vicious cycle. During this process, permanent and irreversible personality traits develop and grow, becoming more significant and basic to life itself than any specific addictive behavior. (This explains why addicts frequently add different types of substances or non-chemical addictive behavior to their life style and often switch from one prominent acting-out behavior to another). The key concept here is that eventually the addict forms a dependent relationship with his or her own addictive personality! At this point, the addict is powerless to change the behavior and will continue to deteriorate to total incapacitation or death, unless he or she in utter desperation relinquishes the illusion of control, admits that life has become unmanageable, and surrenders to outside help.

Recovery begins with becoming and learning to stay abstinent from addictive behavior, through medical treatment, counseling, addiction education, self-help groups, etc. However, a recovery program must go much further than abstinence. It is a process of learning (or re-learning) and practicing normal, healthy behaviors: first social (open and honest human interaction) and then productive/vocational (gradually assuming more independent adult responsibility). However, the addiction has made a permanent impact on the individual’s personality, creating tendencies to circumvent the difficult, often painful, recovery process by interacting with other people in more immediately gratifying, immature, controlling ways. Thus, the addict will likely use and manipulate others and exhibit impatience, inflexibility, impulsivity, and poor judgment. Self-esteem is still relatively low, so assertiveness, stress management, and decision-making skills are poor. In a job situation, these behaviors often result in dissension, disruption, and inefficient productivity, and can cause conflicts within co-workers, resistance to supervision, and decreased work tolerance. Obviously, termination from the job could result. Furthermore, the option to activate the original destructive, addictive behavior remains embedded in the core of the addict’s personality. On some level, the addict continues to believe that there is a mood-changing substance or behavior that can provide immediate nurturing, comfort, pleasure, and for a time help one to feel better and more adequate. The addictive behavior itself lies dormant during remission, but is always there potentially to be activated as a desperate coping mechanism in the face of a highly stressful situation. Because stressful situations can occur in life at any time, relapse is always a distinct possibility. And when a relapse of addictive behavior occurs, life again becomes impaired by the aforementioned limitations of active addiction.

One common highly stressful life situation that is especially pertinent to the vocational rehabilitation of an addict is the persistence of underemployment beyond early recovery. The nature and timing of productive responsibility is tricky and crucial in the addiction recovery process. Stress can cause relapse, and the kind of work that causes stress changes for some individuals as recovery progresses. For the first six months to a year (or longer in some cases) in recovery, an addict works to support his or her recovery program, not just economically, but also as an integral part of the therapeutic process itself. At this stage, employment brings one into the re-learning process of acquiring and handling more responsibility that is productive. The work should be on a relatively low stress, often menial job, while the individual is putting more energy into the basic recovery issues of acceptance, healthy dependency, trust, honesty, and intimacy with other people. However, after about a year in recovery (varying among individuals), increasing self-esteem, by way of more appropriate and challenging personal achievement, becomes a key issue. This usually means a shift into, or taking positive steps toward, satisfactory employment that is commensurate with one’s intelligence, interests, abilities, education, and previous experience. At this point, crucial to staying in recovery, are both stimulation during the hours spent productively, and the identification of a suitable “vocation” or “career” as an integral aspect of one’s self image.  Achieving this goal without the help of professional vocational rehabilitation assistance can be extremely difficult, if not impossible. This is due to the negative impact of the disease of addiction on the person’s physical and mental health, work history, work habits, finances, family and community support systems, and self-confinence to sell oneself as a valuable, productive worker and to earn the respect of both self and employer. The frustration, boredom, and poor self-image perpetuated by under-employment, can indeed create enough stress to bring about a relapse of the addictive behavior. Because such a relapse could easily render the individual incapable of working at any level, a recovering addict in such a life situation (as determined through appropriate counseling and evaluation) certainly has a vocational handicap, even while in recovery and after having been employed at some level for a length of time.

It is true that addicts can often benefit from some short-term assistance while in early recovery. However, when considering actual “vocational rehabilitation” in this disability group, it is crucial with many individuals (not all) to maintain a distinction between the temporary interim jobs of early recovery and the longer term vocation objective pertaining to the personal fulfillment of a rewarding occupation or career. The situation is analogous to that of a high school or college student who works part-time in summer jobs, but whose primary objective is formal learning—getting an education. In many cases the interim jobs have little or no similarity to longer term career goals. No one would deny this young person the benefit of an education because he or she can function on a lower level job, while the primary objective is to learn to live and cope in the world again without the crutch of the active process of the disease of addiction.

In fact, in most cases, working an interim job for several months should be a requirement for vocational services, because it demonstrates the responsibility and motivation to maintain a solid recovery program—a critical factor in assessing an addictive individual for feasibility for rehabilitation services. On the other side of the coin, the counselor should be very careful not to offer vocational (i.e. “career goal”) services too early in the client’s recovery. Doing so would “enable” the addiction and actually interfere with the recovery process. The addictive nature is to seize every opportunity to distract oneself from dealing with painful, basic recovery issues by diverting attention and energy to something he or she wants that seems less painful to pursue. A “rewarding career,” like a geographical change in residence, and many other distractions, can be pursued by the manipulative nature of the addict as a false “quick-cure,” with the rehabilitation counselor or other helpers being “set up” as manipulative enablers of the disease process. After the first year of recovery, the addict has usually grown to the stage where suitable vocational or career choice is a legitimate recovery issue, and in some cases is crucial to the maintenance and progression of the recovery process itself.

Therefore, in terms of eligibility, the rehabilitation counselor and other helpers should then be free to appropriately serve the addicted individual, as long as they are knowledgeable of and respect the nature and timing of the recovery process, and what services are appropriate to a particular stage of recovery.

THE END

(Steve Parrett and I worked with addicted clients for many years. We provided vocational rehabilitation counseling and other needed services as appropriate after our clients completed the initial phases of their recovery process. This initial period consisted of detox, outpatient treatment, 12-Step Program participation, halfway house residence, counseling, and whatever else the clients needed. Almost all were required to remain clean and sober for one year before any in-depth vocational testing and counseling was provided. The reason for this extended period of time is the fact that alcohol and drug abuse alters the brain is such a way that it does not return to normal for about a year. Most psychologists do not do personality or IQ testing until after about a year of sobriety, because they will otherwise get a false impression of the client and his or her abilities. Joe Wilkins)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

ADDENDUM TO CHAPTER 15 IN JOE’S BOOK, “HOW TO RAISE SUCCESSFUL CHILDREN”  — Joe Wilkins, Copyright © 2015

 

When I wrote the above book, I was not fully aware of the pervasiveness of the electronic media on all our lives. Since the early 1950’s my generation was initially aware of how television was interrupting the study habits of some of our school children, and how many of us had curtailed our reading habits in favor of getting our information and entertainment from television instead. However, in those days it was not  a major problem, and was in fact considered to be a blessing, freeing us from some degree of tediousness and boredom in those who suffered from humdrum lives.

However, in recent years there has been an explosion of electronic devices, beyond the simple television set: cell phones, video games, earphone players, laptops, i-pads, tablets, and numerous other instruments that are quickly becoming integral parts of our lives. In and of themselves, these devices are good for the advancement of civilization–if we use them properly. Communication is easier and faster. Research about particular topics has been greatly facilitated by the availability of the Internet. Commerce, advertising, and shopping can be conducted from home. The future of our technology seems so wonderful that some believe it will promote a world with little or no limits.

Some of these positive dreams will happen, but like with all technology there will be some prices to pay. This article is to up-date my readers with some cautionary considerations with which they may not be aware, and which are especially important for child-rearing parents to know.

In Chapters 4,5,and 6 of my book we discussed, respectively, Thinking, Emotional, and Behavioral/Social skill development in children. Many experts believe that the earliest years, ages 0 to 6, are the most important, setting the stage for the years leading to the teens and adulthood. Everyone is aware of the many trials of the teenage years, but after a few years of awkward growth and development, ending at about age eighteen or so, most people progress on into the adult world feeling they have most of what they need to pursue their life goals. About all else they think will be needed is education to prepare them for specific jobs or careers, usually at college, technical training, or on-the-job instruction.

However, recent neurological and psychological research has now demonstrated that what we used to believe about human growth and development was a book without an ending. There is now a final chapter being written, which we can tentatively title, “The Human Brain Does Not Stop Growing Until About Age 25, Or Thereabouts!” What is being discovered is that parts of the brain continue to grow, developing its unique wiring diagram of neuron connections until the mid-twenties. And the most affected part of the brain is the pre-frontal cortex, where most of our “higher civilization” skills are developed–skills such as rational thinking, socialization, complex abstract reasoning, and other neurological growths that go to produce competent, productive adults.

So what, one may ask, does all this have to do with modern media devices? The crux of the situation is this: the development of certain critical  parts of the brain require extensive face-to-face communication and socialization among children, from birth until the mid twenties. The brain is not finished growing as soon as the child graduates from high school–or college! And the pervasive use of cell phones, i-pads, computers, and other electronic media by developing children and young adults, inhibits the development of those parts of the brain necessary to becoming a complete person!

One may legitimately ask how does being overly involved in the use of  electronic media inhibit the brain from developing to its maximum? It’s a complicated process, but avoiding direct communication with others limits face-to-face interaction, obscures the ability to observe body language, pick up subtle inflections in family and social situations, and other sophisticated nuances that families, tribes, schools, communities, and countries require of our citizens.

Almost all electronic involvement  on computers, the internet, electronic games, e-mail, Twitter, Facebook, cellphones, and telephones, in varying degrees, limits the total impact of the communication from one person to another. Can one imagine the messages that a young man and woman would get should the beau propose marriage to his girl over some electronic media, versus doing it in person while holding her hand! Absent would be the smell of her perfume, the cadence of their breathing, the look in both their eyes, the surrounding sounds, the anticipatory expectations, and all the other subtle nuances of the event. And all  the stimuli arising from a personal, face-to-face marriage proposal would have a radically different impact on both their developing brains, versus a proposal made over some electronic media!  And it is the presence of critical, personal stimuli which causes new brain connections to form, many stimuli which would be absent over a cell phone or Twitter.

Back when this counselor was working with mentally ill patients, several professional colleagues in private practice told me how they were doing more “phone counseling and therapy.” Initially, I didn’t know what to make of this, because all my training and experience consisted of dealing with clients face-to-face, either individually or in groups. Phone conversations were to set appointments for direct meetings or other minor issues. Soon, professional journal articles began to appear as to the benefits of this “phone counseling.” I never accepted it, because I always valued all the information I could get by directly observing the client’s body language: pupils in their eyes getting wider or narrower, wringing of hands, perspiring, blushing or blanching, arms defensively crossing, leaning forward or backward, shuffling of feet, smiling or frowning–all non- verbal information important to the situation and permanently being inscribed on their brains in their intellectual and emotional systems. None of this would have been available to me or them over a phone or on Facebook.

Therapy consists of helping clients develop “corrective” programs in their thinking, feeling, and behaving brains, trying to overcome and replace “bad” programs that they learned in earlier years–or never were taught in the first place! Now, imagine a child brought up on a steady diet of electronic media communication–to the neglect of interpersonal, intimate interaction with others. Such a child arriving at post-age 25 adulthood would be quite sophisticated in the electronic media world, but would be less capable in other important areas of life. Imagine a person whose spelling lessons were from Twitter only, or whose math ability always required the use of a computer!

The Dana Foundation, an organization advancing brain research, found that the human brain continues to develop its “wiring” diagram well into the mid twenties. The most affected areas of the brain are the frontal lobes, which are critical to the development of high level cognitive skills, such as judgement, intellectual capabilities, and the regulation of emotions. And a Kaiser Foundation study noted that high school students spent about 6.5 hours per day on their computers, supposedly studying, but actually two-thirds of that time was spent on other things, such as playing games, cruising the internet, etc. These students became very good at multi-tasking, but became superficial in many important behavioral skills, and the learning quality was not good. They were spending too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends electronically.

A review of several studies indicates the following results in people who have spent too much time with electronic media:

1. There is depersonalization (lack of empathy) from limited direct contact with people. They often don’t have a good sense of what society’s normal behavior is.
2. They communicate more often– but the quality of their communication is weaker.
3. Kids who spend too much time in front of a media screen, communicating with their friends, rather than being with them personally, are less likely to understand emotions, don’t create strong relationships, and tend to become more dependent on others.
4. Because kids need to be hugged and touched a lot instead of being texted, their overuse of technology directly affects their brain development.
5. The more children interact with others through electronic media, rather than in person, their emotions are connected to the media exchange itself, resulting in a deficit in intimacy need fulfillment.
6. Social media communication makes it easy to “hide”, while still appearing to be okay.
7. Cellphone usage while driving is like driving drunk
8. Technology and screen time rewires brains in certain patterns that can inhibit the development of brain neurological circuits that control more traditional learning, such as reading, writing and arithmetic skills. Any attention deficit disorder causes here?
9. In a 2011 study girls sent about 4000 texts per month, while boys sent around 2800. It doesn’t take much speculation to imagine what that is doing to their developing brains. Not being in substantial, direct contact with others during childhood, rather than being with them personally, makes people less likely to understand emotions, less able to create strong relationships, and tending  to become more dependent on others.

 

Summing all this up shows that parents need to use good sense in allowing their children in the use of all these modern media devices. Obviously there are benefits to learning their use, however, it is abundantly clear that nothing should interfere with also exposing them to an abundance of social interactions;  reading books, magazines, newspapers, and other printed materials where proper English is used; exposure to stimulating conversations face to face; and developing the other skills outlined in this book.

All new inventions and technical advances promote the growth of the human race in many ways. Yet, there is always a downside, or unintended consequences, to these advances. If we were all robots there would be few problems, but the hard reality is we all possess a brain that has been pretty much the same for thousands of years. And this brain, while capable of marvelous things when properly programmed, still requires a lot of good, old-fashioned learning. Make sure your children get it all.

 

( If you like this article, the book to which this article is an addition is available on amazon.com. The reviews have been very favorable. Check them out. You won’t find a book like this one.)

 

THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT

By

Joe Wilkins

Copyright © 2015

 

The butterfly effect is a phrase that is being used more these days, but very few people really know what it means or how the term originated. However, to those readers who like to contemplate the mysterious, metaphysical aspects of our lives, I am hopeful this article will be of interest and benefit.

A useful definition of the term, butterfly effect, would be: Any event that occurs now, inevitably dictates or changes certain things in the future, but those future events are usually impossible to predict.

Let’s look at a hypothetical example: In our first scenario Little Bobby is up at bat for his Little League team in the final championship game in the bottom of the last inning. The bases are loaded and his team  is behind three runs—needing four runs to win. Bobby proceeds to hit a grand slam homerun, and his team wins. He is instantly a hero. In the aftermath, in his community, he becomes the boy that all remember, and he receives much respect and adulation. This in turn convinces him that he is a good athlete and should consider taking baseball very seriously during the rest of his life. Because of this he puts much more effort into baseball, wins a college scholarship, plays well in college, gets professional offers, goes to the minor leagues, but gets hurt and can play no more. He spends the rest of his life working as a salesman, a job he doesn’t much like, but which provides a modest living for him and his family.

In the alternative to the above scenario, instead of hitting the home run, he strikes out and his team goes down in disappointing defeat. He is disappointed that he did not get a hit, that he let his team down, and soon thereafter begins to lose his passion for baseball. Instead, he puts more energy into his other interests, especially science, going on to college and becoming a civil engineer, working on many satisfying building projects. Later, he starts his own construction company and becomes quite wealthy.

Thus, the reader can see that in that one instant of time, with that final swing of the bat—one time hitting the ball for a home run, the second time striking out—Bobby’s life is completely altered onto two different pathways. Of course, in both of the above scenarios there were other butterfly effect moments in Bobby’s life as he followed each particular pathway, but the key moment was the swing of the bat, and whether he hit the ball—or missed!

An axiom of the butterfly effect would be this: After each  episode in life, there always follows a particular set of circumstances and events that emerge  from that event. Rephrased, following each behavior there always follow particular circumstances, some of which are of our choosing, but many of which lead to “unintended consequences.” Some common examples that lead to differing results are: marrying one girl or husband instead of another; accepting a particular job; moving into a certain neighborhood; walking down a particular street and getting robbed; a golfer selecting a four iron over a five iron, and getting a hole-in-one; driving down an alternative street and getting into an auto accident. It is easy to see that in many ways life is like a crap game. We toss the dice and get different results most of the time.

But now, dear reader, you must be wondering what has all this to do with butterflies and their effects? Where did that term come from and how does it relate to what has been discussed thus far?

How I came upon this concept is rather unusual. It was the Fall of 1953, I was in the 11^th grade, reading an EC Comics, science-fiction, comic book story. The story was set in the year 2055, and time travel was an established activity. One particular company promoted safaris, whereby, for a considerable fee, hunters could travel back to the age of dinosaurs, and shoot a T-Rex dinosaur for a trophy. When the hunter and guides arrived at their destination, they were required to remain on “levitation pathways,” which suspended them above ground so as not to contact the environment and disturb anything. When the hunter, a man named Echels, confronts a T-Rex, the ferocious beast terrifies him, and he jumps off the pathway and runs through the jungle. His guides are furious with him, but they have to kill the T-Rex for their own safety. They locate Echels, then make him do some needed things to minimize the “damage.” Then all return to the year 2055.

However, when they get back, they notice some drastic changes in their society: English words are spelled and spoken strangely, people behave differently–and election results for the President have been reversed from what they were when they left. When Echels sits and takes his muddy boots off, he notices a crushed butterfly on his sole, and it is clear that the death of that butterfly, crushed as he ran in panic through the jungle back in pre-history, set off a chain of events that altered history thereafter. Thus, the phrase, butterfly effect, had its beginnings. In the following years, others have picked up on the phrase, especially weather scientists and forecasters.

I later learned that this EC Comics story was excerpted from a short story, “A Sound of Thunder,” written by famous science-fiction writer, Ray Bradbury, for Collier’s magazine, issue of 6/28/1952, and was later re-published In Playboy magazine in June, 1956. There was a movie made based on the story, but it was poorly done, and has deservedly been mostly forgotten.

What is the point of all this, you may ask? Surely this is something of interest only to philosophically-minded people. What has it got to do with my life? Good questions.

Let me illustrate with  two personal examples.

My maternal grandfather, Ballard Lynch, was an Army surgeon. He was drafted in 1918 and sent to the battlefields of France. He was newly married and had his only child, my mother, just three months before he was shipped overseas. He saw my mother, as an infant, just a few times. In France, he was immediately sent to the front lines to address the wounds of the American soldiers. In a makeshift “hospital,” consisting of blankets and cots on the ground, he and two other doctors were attending to the wounded. Suddenly, an artillery shell hit next to them killing him and one other doctor. This was just two weeks before the war ended. That shell, killing him was a “butterfly” moment for me. Tragic as it was, it forever altered my maternal grandmother’s life, thrusting her onto a life’s pathway she otherwise would not have been on. It led to my mother being raised in a different community and under different circumstances than would have never otherwise happened, whereby she grew up, met, and married my father, producing me, my brother and sister. Without grandfather’s  death I would not exist, much less be writing on this subject. A sadness that I feel about my grandfather was that I never got to know and enjoy life with him, and the despair I feel when I think about the fact that without his death in France, I wouldn’t exist.

A second instance occurred with my paternal grandfather, in frontier Colorado in the early 1900’s, when there occurred an event which guaranteed my existence. Grandfather escaped from a fall down  into a deep well, miles from anyone on the prairie. His escape efforts are described elsewhere on this web site, under the category, Remembrances, “A Western Story.” The fact that he escaped near death, enabled him to later have my father. If he had died, I would not exist.

Therefore, we can see that each of our existences is strongly dictated by chance, or types of butterfly effects. While I am glad I had the opportunity to live and experience life, I am also acutely aware of how chancy and fragile life can be. We are each the product of countless butterfly effects, leading to our very existence, our good fortunes, and even the bad things that happen to us.  To minimize the negative consequences we need to control future butterfly effects as best we can by examining our current behavior and following those pathways that have the highest probability of leading to good outcomes. However, the follow-up of unintended consequences is often hard to overcome. (Politicians, please pay attention!)

Perhaps, the greatest positive outcome of a specific butterfly effect, was the crucifixion of Jesus. Suppose Pontius Pilate had ignored the crowds and freed Jesus instead of Barabbas. What would have followed? Who knows.

Elsewhere on this website is a contemplative-opinion article, entitled “Searching for God,” under the Religious/Spiritual category. When I wrote this article I did not have the butterfly effect in mind, but it is a fact that the very creation of our solar system, as it is now structured, is the result of a series of cosmic, butterfly effects.

To thinking people, there is nothing new about all this. We all know that B follows A—as well as X, Y, Z, and a bunch of other things! We just need to take reasonable care with our behavior, so that which follows is most likely what we desire.

By

Joe Wilkins

Copyright  © 2014

There’s a basic truth about us human beings that, when understood, eases our ability to make sense of all the turmoil that’s occurring in politics and social discord in America today. I call it the “I” factor, which asserts that all human beings think about themselves first and others second. Religious people might call it original sin. The ancient Greeks called it hubris. We counselors and psychologists call it narcissism. The guy in the street might call it self-centeredness.

Political progressives might state that, “No, I do not think of myself first. I think of the common good first! I want there to be peace and harmony in the world so we can all live together without strife and turmoil.” A noble goal, but I offer the proposition that while kumbahyah-togetherness is important to them, it is secondary to the more primary need to serve themselves first! With their efforts to ignore or oppose opposite views—despite possible facts to the contrary–they are demonstrating that these strongly held attitudes about serving their fellow man are actually supported by a more fundamental need, which is to feel good about themselves by supporting such causes—ideals which may or may not be supported by objective reality. Some progressives’ lifestyles, careers, and self images may become based on their positions on such matters, making these issues of primary importance to them. This whole process reflects their primary state of mind, and demonstrates that they are defending themselves first and their actual causes secondly.

This pervasive process affects all humankind in varying degrees. For illustration, people who hold certain polarizing positions—such as global warming, political ideologies, religious orientations, and other views—often structure their entire lives in support of these positions. Over time, this support can evolve to mental, emotional, and behavioral changes, strong enough to incline them to alter everything about their lives to support their views even more intensely—often when the facts suggest they should moderate or change their behavior. The social psychologists have termed this process the “effort justification hypothesis,” which states that people who hold strong attitudes about certain beliefs and opinions, will do almost anything to defend these attitudes—even when reality proves them wrong. And, paradoxically, they will engage in continuous behavior to prove themselves “right,” even going to the extent of “recruiting” more converts to their views, supposedly supporting the notion that if everyone thinks like them then they must be right!

All this illustrates that there is something inclining all of us to serve ourselves first, nurturing that state of mind around which we orient our entire lives, followed by structuring our lives to conform to these attitudes. Moreover, other people come in second to this process. We might say that we all have a bit of narcissism in our souls.

This is much like two-year old children who “want what they want when they want it,” and go into tantrums when their parents do not comply with their wishes. In young children, this I-Factor often prompts self-centered outbursts of anger, because they have not yet learned to consider other people’s feelings and needs. Unfortunately, some children pass into adulthood never learning the need to consider others also.

Of course, most people, if properly parented, modify this I-Factor sufficiently to consider others’ positions— but they still value themselves first. If a tiger charges into a primitive village, threatening to kill and eat someone, the first instinct will be for everyone to react to save themselves. Closely following this will be for them to save their loved ones.

Soldiers in combat sometimes sacrifice themselves for their comrades or their country—but this is in service to some “code” they have been taught and believe in. If they did not follow the code, they would have to live with guilt and shame, which is something they are unwilling to endure. Paradoxically, they are still serving themselves first by avoiding shame, even though it could cost them their lives.

I have known people to commit suicide so others will not have to take care of them in their old age. A first impression might be that they do not want to inconvenience others by becoming dependent on them for care, but what they are usually doing is taking care of their need to be independent, and not rely on others. Thus, they are serving themselves first, and others second. I once had an elderly client who said if he got ill to the point he was dependent on others, he’d put a gun to his head. It was more important for him to maintain his “I-Factor” of being independent than to worry about how his suicide would affect his family and friends. Fortunately, he died of natural causes—with no one else having to care for him.

In this regard, conservative people have the same orientation as progressives. They have political and social positions they want to promote, and they too are serving their ideologies first and others second. Some religious leaders are in the same position when they promote their religious beliefs to their followers, suggesting they are taking care of themselves first, and others second.

Even in the animal world, we see this scenario playing out. A mother bear has to feed herself before nursing her cubs. If she does not they all die. This is pretty much true of all animals. The mother bear is like the dedicated soldier in combat: she instinctively preserves herself first against all threats, but will fight to the death to protect those cubs.

Ancient humankind had a similar orientation: survival meant serving the tribe, in hunting, gathering food, building shelter, etc, but all had to serve themselves first, to do what they had to do to stay alive, so they could serve the tribe.

Psychologists have explained this conflict between the “I-Factor” versus serving the rest of humankind, with the concept of independence vs. mutual inter–dependence: We have to maintain our own independence first, thus freeing us to then serve others. But we cannot serve others very well if we neglect our own needs. Since few can survive solely on their own, we are forced to think of ourselves first, keeping ourselves fit and healthy, so  we can then serve others to get certain mutual needs met, promoting the survival of us all.

However, many well-intentioned persons get confused when going about this process. Our recent Congressional leaders are prime examples. For instance our Congress-persons, in the recent health care fiasco, have evolved into two opposing factions, whereby the Democrats got what they wanted by out-maneuvering the Republicans. In essence, they went to “war” and defeated the Republican opposition. The Harry Reids and the Nancy Pelosis got what they wanted by using superior Congressional   force. In addition, they were serving themselves first by passing legislation that completed their fundamental psychological need to give the American people what they believed was needed, completing a deep-seated need- fulfillment within themselves. The little voice inside them was probably saying something like, “We have given the American people a great healthcare system, so what  wonderful  people we are!” This helps them complete benevolent self-images of themselves, which is necessary to maintain their basic egos, and the ego always demands to be served first.

Thus, we have the great conflict within ourselves to reconcile this primal need to serve ourselves first and others second. The narcissistic and pathological people never consider others first, but we will dismiss them for obvious reasons and look at the average citizen who faces this dilemma. What does one do?

One technique is to “surrender” our egos to a higher power. This is a process whereby we look for something outside ourselves to reconcile life’s problems. Some people surrender to God, Allah, the Happy Hunting Ground, Buddha, etc. This helps them  struggle with their own egos, and they can assign a portion of the responsibility to their God of choice:  “It’s what God wants me to do!” Others typically assign a portion of their egos to their ideal view of government, believing it can create a better world.

Some alcoholics and drug addicts, when they have demonstrated they cannot stay sober using their own willpower, are asked to surrender their egos to the God of their understanding. This suggests that only when they do this can they get sober—and most who choose this path, do get better. Like the child who has accepted that others are important also, they are then free to relate properly to the rest of the world. There is no greater I-Factor than that state of mind in an alcoholic or drug addict, whereby the primary motivation in their lives is to get that next drink or drug fix. But if they have truly gotten clean and sober, they will have rid themselves of their self-serving way of thinking, by surrendering it to a higher power, thus freeing themselves to devote their actions to others in the ways they are supposed to.

Summing up, we all have a primal need to take care of ourselves first and foremost. Without proper socialization at an early age, many are prone to neglect their relations with others. Clever I-Factor people will construct elaborate rationales and belief systems to cover up their narcissism and will convince themselves that they are truly in service of others, when deep down in their egos they are really doing these outward acts of benevolence to maintain their incomplete ego identities. Sometimes this works out to the good—sometimes not!

 

By

Joe Wilkins

Copyright © 2014

Recently, on the Fox network’s program “The Five,” one panelist started condemning America for conquering and subduing the Indians, continuing the mistreatment over the years. His response was in concert with the tendency of many people to take the position that America is an arrogant power—and always has been—trying to impose its will upon the rest of the world.

Trying to connect America’s recent military actions with past mistreatment of America’s Indians is a stretch, in my opinion. In his view, we are a cause for most of the problems in the world today, citing our belligerence for starting the wars in Viet Nam, Iraq, Afghanistan, etc.  Though many may argue the appropriateness of our engaging in certain military actions, he neglected the fact that America rescued the world during World Wars I & II, without our help we would probably be speaking German and Japanese today. He seemed to be using our treatment of the Indians to justify his attitude that America needs to be “perfect” when engaging in foreign affairs and wars—actions which are impossible.

If all groups of people followed the Golden Rule, then his view of how nations should behave would be possible. Unfortunately, throughout history, almost all groups, tribes, and nations have conquered and subdued others for their own benefit. It appears to be the basic human way of behavior. A review of the history of slavery, for instance, shows that almost all nations have engaged in slavery in one form or another. Attila the Hun, Genghis Khan, Greece, Persia, China, European countries, Rome—the list goes on and on.

And some of the American Indians are not innocent either; they too, like all of humankind, suffer from this condition, whereby conditions in the collective human psyche, and numerous external conditions, impel one group to control and subdue others—usually for economic or survival reasons.

About the American Indian situation, the first American settlers—our ancestors—came from Europe seeking religious freedom, economic opportunity, and escape from various forms of oppression. They did not come with the idea of suppressing the Indians, being rather unaware of the New World in many respects, especially the extent of the American Indian population. Most of the original colonists tried to cooperate with the Indians simply to survive the harsh conditions, but were often treated in a hostile manner, causing them to reciprocate in a like manner.

The point of this column is to show that it is often inappropriate to connect or blame present day groups for the sins of their ancestors. It is doubtful if any reader of this column has ever thought ill of, or mistreated, an American Indian. Perhaps Hollywood’s western movies are guilty of misrepresenting Native Americans, but there have recently been many movies representing them in a more accurate light.

Even so, the Indians seem to suffer from the same human frailties as the rest of us. It seems to be a major human flaw to portray today’s misbehavior as being caused by events in the past. While the past does have its role, it is not the cause of today’s misbehavior, because we still possess free will, and we need to choose to exercise it more often.

Thus, I am advocating the use of past human misdeeds, not for blame, but as learning experiences to correct our behavior today.

AN ANSWER TO GUN CONTROL ADVOCATES
Joe H. Wilkins, Jr.
Copyright © 2013
I have always been an advocate for US citizens to own and use firearms in a responsible manner. As a boy my father and I spent many hours hunting in the Florida scrubland, hunting for deer, turkeys, doves, and squirrels. To kill the game and bring it home for my mother to cook for us was an exciting time for a young boy. It gave me some measure of purpose in my young life, and I will never forget the good times with my father afield, stalking the game of our choice.

As I matured, and my life changed, the hunting in my life ceased; there were other things to pursue. However, I have never lost the positive feelings I had toward hunting and the proper use of firearms. The lessons I learned with hunting and target practice have served me well over the years: 1) discipline required in stalking elusive game 2) development of precise hand-eye coordination needed to kill a squirrel high in a tree with a single shot .22 rifle 3) the need to be extremely alert tromping through rattlesnake-infested scrubland 4) how to be silent when the occasion demanded 5) how to process youthful, ambivalent feelings of life and death, as we skinned and gutted the game to be eaten later 6) how to respect all wildlife and to kill only game that would be eaten later 7) and how to have the proper relationship and attitudes toward guns.

When I joined the military after high school, out of sixty men in my unit, I was second in marksmanship. Handling that .30 cal. M-1 carbine came very naturally to me, with the targets extremely easy to hit. I felt very good and well prepared for combat should the need ever arise—which, thankfully, never happened.

These thoughts stirred in me after talking to a good friend, regarding those people in our country who want to outlaw and/or restrict the use of firearms in America. At first glance it is easy to see why many people without proper experience with firearms, or who have had negative experiences, would support banning firearms. These people may have been emotionally traumatized by violent movies and TV programs, or taught to fear them by family and friends, or taken their anti-gun positions from the philosophies of those people who have concluded that to stop the misuse of firearms we need to ban them altogether. This later position is the “throw-the-baby-out-with-the-bathwater” approach.
The problem with all these ideas is that they are targeted only to the “good” firearm people and don’t apply to those who would use them to murder or rob.

Let’s consider another anti-gun position, which I think is based on faulty reasoning. The basic problem with guns is that some people feloniously misuse them to commit various crimes. Then, law-abiding citizens become alarmed and disturbed by these people’s actions. We see them committing crimes with guns, so some traumatized citizens think that outlawing these weapons will solve the problem. But the weapons are neutral, in that is there is no more negative morality in a pistol than there is in a kitchen knife, a speeding automobile, a bottle of rat poison, an axe—or any other instrument that can be used to kill someone. The problem is wholly within the person that misuses these things! But we are not sure how to deal with and prevent criminals from misusing these instruments, so a misguided solution is to try to ban them, ignoring the other things that can be used to commit crimes.

I am a retired counselor, and for thirty years I dealt with murderers, child molesters, wife beaters, vehicular homicide offenders and other criminals, and I have learned that we cannot stop these people from committing their offenses by taking away their “tools.” They simply find another way to exact their violence upon us. So, instead of taking away their guns, we need to learn to control whatever it is in their psyches that impels them to maim, shoot, and destroy those people and things that the larger society values and wants to preserve. Basically the alternative to gun control is proper child rearing and rehabilitation of gun abusers. But we’re not very good at this. Meanwhile, we need to be able to protect ourselves.

Another aspect to consider is the reality that guns are now easily available “under the table” or on the black market, and always will be. Trying to keep weapons out of these marketers is folly. If we passed laws banning the use of and manufacture of all guns in the US, the manufacturing of them would simply go overseas to some other enterprising capitalists, and those in America who wanted guns would still find a way to get them. Banning a thing does not preclude its use. I offer Prohibition and our current illegal drug problems as evidence.

So we can see that there is no 100 percent solution by trying to create a society whereby we restrict or ban guns to the extent that we could reduce crimes to the level that the gun control people would wish. It is tragic that many people are killed by guns in our country, but many more are killed by traffic accidents and no one is proposing the banning of automobiles. We tend to focus on the violence that is on the pervasive news media, that which stirs our visceral, fearful feelings, and neglects other sorts of death and violence, which are often worse.

As an example, when the first Iraq war broke out a high Army official friend of mine came up to me in church, after the war had been raging for about a year and said, “You know Joe, I guess we ought to be thankful for this war as far as our troops are concerned.”
I looked at him as if he were crazy and asked how he could make such a statement.
He replied, “Well Joe, we’ve run some extensive statistical analyses and have found that less men are being killed in combat, and Iraq in general, than in comparable periods of peacetime when these soldiers are stationed in the US, doing their normal peacetime soldiering!”

He said that the facts about this were incontrovertible, and we finally concluded that the explanation had to be that while in the US, military personnel were getting killed in large numbers in auto accidents, home accidents, drunken brawls, from alcohol and drug abuse, murders, and assorted other “normal” ways we die in peacetime. An explanation that I hypothesized was that soldiers in combat were hyper alert to dangers to their lives, while here at home their guards were down and they were susceptible to accidents.

Recently an article in the Wall Street Journal noted that there were over three thousand auto-deer collisions per day in the US. This is over a million per year. How many deaths per year this involves was not stated, but the number has to be substantial. I have personal knowledge of friends being killed in this type of accident.

Let me conclude with what I believe is the ultimate argument for allowing responsible people to carry handguns and keeping whatever type of firearms they might wish in their homes. My aforementioned friend suggested this scenario. Suppose you are an ardent anti-gun citizen and a home invader enters your home and kills you and your family, which you might have been able to prevent had you owned a gun. Next, suppose some angel of mercy in the next life offers you an alternative, restoring your life and allowing you to go back to the moment just before you and your family are killed—only this time the angel will put a gun in your hand to defend yourself! Are you going to turn the gun down? I don’t think so.

A theological aspect to this whole issue is that believers of an afterlife might be inclined to go ahead and be murdered and go to heaven, which will be a better place anyway. And these people paradoxically tend to be the more fundamentally religious people—as evidenced by the Radical Muslims, who believe they will be rewarded by Allah for killing themselves and others by guns or other weapons. I have had very fundamentalist Christians somewhat of this mindset as clients, who are unafraid of death, because they believe they will go to a better world, especially if they rid the world of some undesirable people who do not follow God’s will.

But anti-gun atheists and agnostics are the hardest to understand. A pure atheist believes that there is no afterlife—that this life is it; once they are dead they no longer exist in this world or the imagined next one. But many of these folks are staunch advocates of strict gun control or abolishing them altogether. So one would think that they would be strongly in favor of anything that would protect them from dying, such as handguns for protection, because if someone kills them that is it! No more “them”—anywhere. There can be many psychological explanations for holding such attitudes, one of which is they just react against guns out of fear and have become non-thinkers in this regard. It’s possible they believe that a more perfect world can be created by by governments controlling the guns, and since they have no traditional religious beliefs, government is their “religion,” and they have no other recourse than to put their hopes and dreams of a more perfect world into government.

In summary there are many reasons people are against guns in general, and they conveniently ignore the 2nd Amendment of the US Constitution. But this country was liberated from Great Britain by citizen soldiers using their own weapons in most cases, and if they did not have weapons with which to fight, liberation would have been impossible.
So, let’s not go off half-cocked about gun control.